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Lost quotations

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My name, well that don't matter... | 17-Jun-09

Our enquirer was at comprehensive school during the early 70's, and in their english text book they had a poem that started


My name well that don't matter
I goes to this here school
I have a reputation
for breaking every rule
The teachers they all hate me .....

9 comments have been made on this quote. Click here to read them and then add your own!


Do you know this poem? Do you have any clues to help us find it?


Comments:

I too am searching for this poem
Janice Songhurst-Jones

I was also looking for this poem which I learned at school. I remember a bit more
after The teachers they all hate me

Every master I annoys
Cause I'm a right old criminal
One of the boys

The first day at me new school
The teacher got quite mad,
Cause straight away I lost me cap
That's how the lav got blocked
And I burned me new school blazer
Lighting gaspers in me pocket
Cause I'm a right old criminal
One of the boys (as far as I remember)

Sue Dunmore (nee Bull)

Susan Dunmore

The poem you are looking for is by William Spencer.
It use to exist in a kids book of English at schools and it Starts...

My name; well that dont matter,
But I goes to this ere school,
Ive got a reputation, For reaking every rule,
The teachers they all hate me, Every master I annoys
couse I'm a right old criminal, dead smart, one of the boys.

Hope this helps your search if not dont worry I have the book and can type the thing out nad send it.
John Bourne

Yep I was sent to some schoolin Egglescliffe
And I would love to have the full version I remember stood on a table in a childrens home reciting
just past
and I burns me new school blazer hiding
"gaspers in me pocket"
and I decides in this ere boat its me whos gonna rock it ..

( not bad for someone whos never smoked lol)

Would love the full version as I can only remember about a third which isn bad considering I stayed in the school for about week and half before getting sent on elsewere again....
They dont write em like this anymore and no matter how Ive searched I cant find it ......
Thanks Candy

Candy Floss

I have been trying to find this poem for years. Never thought anyone else had heard of it! I can only remember the first verse from school which was a very long time ago. Would love the whole thing
Ellie Bradshaw

may i get a full copy of the poem DEAD SMART ONE OF THE BOYS
farida bacus

Dead Smart
One of the Boys
-By William Samson from "Teenagers in Conflict"

My name... Well that doesn't matter
But I go to this 'ere school,
And I've got a reputation
For breaking every rule.
The teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

The first day at my new school
My teacher got right shocked,
'Coz straight away I lose my cap -
That's how the lav. got blocked!
And I burn my new school blazer
Hiding gaspers in my pocket,
And I decide, in this 'ere boat
It's me gonna rock it.

Next day the form's dead eager
As through the gates they swarm,
And they elect some swotty clot
As captain of the form.
Now so far I've gone easy,
Just sizing up the dump,
But when I see what that job's worth,
I give that clot a clump

So he resigns, and after
I've persuaded all the rest,
I get elected. Then I start
To feather my own nest.
I help with dinner money
Of course I take my cut -
The teacher couldn't work it out,

And he promptly done his nut,
So the teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy,
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

You lot go to Assembly,
But me, I've never there.
I sit and have a crafty smoke
Down the - well, you know where.
Then I copy some kid's homework
And if I get found
I make him say he copied mine,
Or I punch him on the snout.
So as my innocent years roll by
I'm in on every racket
And anyone who tries it on,
He quickly cops a packet!

Till in the fourht year I can claim
To be the school's real boss.
And I spend my time in dodging work,
'Coz work, that's a dead loss.
So the teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

Our form gets up a football team,
Of course I wasn't picked,
So when they left the field they found
Their money has been nicked.
But though they're all dead stupid
They'd guess I had a go,
So when I try to talk to them,
They just don't want to know

Then last week, down the billiard hall,
I join up with a mob.
And we break into some radio shop -
A very crafty job,
Till some dirty copper spots us.
And I'm the one gets caught,
And there's no-one who'll stand by me
Next week when I'm in court.

And you can' help feeling rotten,
When you stand about and wait
For some bloke who'll say 'Hello' to you
But there's no-one who's your mate.
And when the rest all live it up,
There's no-one thinks of me.
But I don't care. When I'm big time
I'll show you - wait and see

All you teachers, you who hates me,
Every master I annoy,
'Coz I'm a right old criminal...
Dead smart... One of the boys...
ferret floozy

I've been searching for this poem as well, I found this version through Google but don't think it's copolete, as I seem to remember a verse that starts; Each week I go down Soho, buys a tanner sexy book, and charges all the prefects half a dollar for a look. There was also some thing in it that refers to him running his own card school.
Anyway, this is what I got from Google.
Dead Smart
One of the Boys
-By William Samson from "Teenagers in Conflict"

My name... Well that doesn't matter
But I go to this 'ere school,
And I've got a reputation
For breaking every rule.
The teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

The first day at my new school
My teacher got right shocked,
'Coz straight away I lose my cap -
That's how the lav. got blocked!
And I burn my new school blazer
Hiding gaspers in my pocket,
And I decide, in this 'ere boat
It's me gonna rock it.

Next day the form's dead eager
As through the gates they swarm,
And they elect some swotty clot
As captain of the form.
Now so far I've gone easy,
Just sizing up the dump,
But when I see what that job's worth,
I give that clot a clump

So he resigns, and after
I've persuaded all the rest,
I get elected. Then I start
To feather my own nest.
I help with dinner money
Of course I take my cut -
The teacher couldn't work it out,

And he promptly done his nut,
So the teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy,
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

You lot go to Assembly,
But me, I've never there.
I sit and have a crafty smoke
Down the - well, you know where.
Then I copy some kid's homework
And if I get found
I make him say he copied mine,
Or I punch him on the snout.
So as my innocent years roll by
I'm in on every racket
And anyone who tries it on,
He quickly cops a packet!

Till in the fourht year I can claim
To be the school's real boss.
And I spend my time in dodging work,
'Coz work, that's a dead loss.
So the teachers they all hate me,
Every master I annoy
'Coz I'm a right old criminal -
Dead smart, one of the boys.

Our form gets up a football team,
Of course I wasn't picked,
So when they left the field they found
Their money has been nicked.
But though they're all dead stupid
They'd guess I had a go,
So when I try to talk to them,
They just don't want to know

Then last week, down the billiard hall,
I join up with a mob.
And we break into some radio shop -
A very crafty job,
Till some dirty copper spots us.
And I'm the one gets caught,
And there's no-one who'll stand by me
Next week when I'm in court.

And you can' help feeling rotten,
When you stand about and wait
For some bloke who'll say 'Hello' to you
But there's no-one who's your mate.
And when the rest all live it up,
There's no-one thinks of me.
But I don't care. When I'm big time
I'll show you - wait and see

All you teachers, you who hates me,
Every master I annoy,
'Coz I'm a right old criminal...
Dead smart... One of the boys...

In the book we learned it from there was an add on that said;

MORAL:
Washig, windows, greenhouses, bones,
Nothing's safe when the neighbourhood kids get to throwing stones.

Hope this helps.
Bob Bohea

This was in a school text book. My Mum suggested I recite this for a school talent show at junior school when I was 11.
Thanks to Mum's direction it was a hit & won the talent contest. A supportive English teacher mentioned that I should consider acting as a career. My supportive parents enrolled me in stage school. Going on to play school bully Gripper Stebson in the BBC children's drama, Grange Hill.
It was 1974 or 75 when I won that school talent contest.
42 years later I'm still working as a professional actor.
I was talking to my mate Colin Burden, actor & Artistic director of The Bootleg theatre who I work with, about this poem & search engined it. The versions here are not entirely as I recall. I'm going to sit down & see if I can recall the version I recited all those decades ago.
Thanks Mum,Dad & my supportive teacher, Mrs Donovan.


Mark Savage


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